Truth, Justice, Unemployment: What CLARK KENT Could Do Next

<i>by <a href=http://www.twitter.com/graemem>Graeme McMillan, Newsarama Contributor</a></i> <p>Oh, Clark. Sure, it's one thing to stand up for your journalistic principals in the middle of the Daily Planet newsroom, but <a href=http://www.newsarama.com/comics/superman-13-clark-quits-daily-planet.html>quitting your job</a> in this economic market? <p>Maybe things are different in the DC Universe, but pretty soon, Clark is going to find himself thinking about eBaying mementos from his various adventures in order to make ends meet if he doesn't get another new job soon. <p>But what should an unemployed Man of Steel do with himself? Here are 10 suggestions. <p><i>Got a comment? There's lots of conversation on Newsarama's <a href=http://www.facebook.com/Newsarama><b>FACEBOOK</b></a> and <a href=http://twitter.com/newsarama><b>TWITTER</b></a>!</i> <p>

ARTISTINAL CHEF

Sure, like <em>you</em> haven't already considered that someone with super-speed would make a fantastic chef. Just think about how quickly your orders would arrive on the table in front of you! And, even better: All of the ingredients would be absolutely fresh, because Superman could <em>fly to wherever they were raised/grown and get them himself after you order them</em>. <p>For all the foodies in the DC Universe who bemoan the lack of ethically-sourced, fresh and organic fast food restaurants, Superman may be able to save the day one more time. Just don't be too upset if the restaurant is closed during the hours of any given Justice League emergency.

FISHERMAN

We know what you're thinking. "Fisherman? <em>Fisherman</em>?" <p>Well, yeah; after all, as <a href=http://www.newsarama.com/film/superman-man-of-steel-teaser-trailer.html>this summer's teaser trailers for next year's <em>Man of Steel</em> movie</a> demonstrated, Clark Kent apparently has a history in that field. <p>But even without that, there's something fitting about Superman taking on a job that requires him to learn about teamwork, learn about patience, and realize that having super-strength isn't always that useful a thing in every circumstance. Could spending some time on a boat be a good thing for the Last Son of Krypton?

FARMER

And speaking of jobs that require a zenlike ability to become in tune with nature... <p>At heart, Clark Kent is a farmer. He was raised on a farm by good farmin' folk, and even if he gave up the family homestead following the death of his parents, there's little doubt that there would be work waiting for him if he decided to drop out of big city life after quitting the Planet and move back to Smallville to get back to his roots. <p>If nothing else, you know that Pa Kent would be proud to see his son put all of the skills he'd learned as a youth well, the ones that didn't involve doing things that no other human being could, of course to good use, finally. That said, even with super-speed, would running a farm leave him enough time to be a superhero?

POLITICIAN

As we've <a href=http://www.newsarama.com/comics/10-political-superheroes-held-office-1.html>pointed out before</a>, Superman has become President of the United States on more than one occasion during his long career as a crimefighter, and that was when he wasn't even trying. <p>Just imagine what the Man of Tomorrow could manage if he actually decided to focus on campaigning for office? If nothing else, the campaign slogans almost write themselves. "Superman: Tougher on Crime than the Other Guy, Because, Come On, He's Superman." "Superman: He Can See Right Through The Opposition (Literally)." "Superman: Because He Really Does Believe In Truth, Justice and The American Way."

STAGE MAGICIAN

Some may consider going from socially aware journalist to stage magician a sideways career move at best, but let's be honest: If anyone was destined for this kind of job, it's Superman. After all, how many illusionists have the dual superpowers of both super-hypnotism <em>and</em> super-ventriloquism? <p>As if that's not enough, think about how easy it would be for him to amaze an audience with his powers of levitation! Admittedly, the character's traditional weakness when it comes to more traditional forms of hocus-pocus may mean that he'd have to restrict that kind of thing to maybe pulling rabbits out of hats or something unless he decides to ask Zatanna for advice, of course. (Note to Clark: Please don't listen to her tips on costuming. You wouldn't look good in fishnets). Otherwise, this is definitely a direction young Mr. Kent should consider very seriously.

NOVELIST

Little commented on, but Clark Kent <em>a</em> Clark Kent, at least has a history as a successful novelist. As part of John Byrne's 1986 <em>Man of Steel</em> reboot of the character, Clark Kent didn't just shed the schlubbier parts of his personality, he went full-tilt in the opposite direction, becoming amazingly successful at whatever he turned his attention to. <p>No surprise, then, that when Kent decided to try a different type of writing from the journalism that had won him a Pulitzer, the result was something that flew off the shelves like particularly wordy speeding bullets (<a href=http://www.amazon.com/Superman-Under-Yellow-Novel-Clark/dp/1563891093>you can actually buy one of his books for yourself from Amazon</a>; no, really). <p>Of course, in the revamped continuity of The New 52, the contemporary Clark Kent hasn't yet tried his hand at fiction... but now that he has all this spare time on his hands, what's stopping him?

CRUSADING JOURNALIST FOR HIRE

Just because Kent has quit the Daily Planet, it doesn't mean that he's actually given up on journalism. In fact, the reason he quit was <em>because</em> he hadn't given up on journalism. <p>So what, exactly, is to stop him from just moving on to another newspaper somewhere? After all, even though the Daily Planet is one of the most well-known of the DCU newspapers, surely there's some version of the New York Times, Washington Post or even international papers of note like the Manchester Guardian out there. Even though New 52 Clark has only been a journalist for five years, surely he's built up enough of a name with all his Superman work to be a writer that other newspapers would want to sign.

TV NEWS ANCHOR

Another position with which Clark Kent has more than a passing familiarity it was, after all, his career for much of the 1970s and '80s, when Galaxy Broadcasting bought the Daily Planet and realized that he was being wasted behind a typewriter the idea of seeing Kent on screen nowadays seems, perhaps, a little less comfortable a fit: How would he deal with the idea of the Internet being able to use any number of screen caps of his face to compare with Superman's? Would the increasingly partisan nature of television reporting cause a problem for a man who stands for truth? <p>And yet, imagining Clark Kent as a superpowered Anderson Cooper isn't too much of a stretch and, at least that way, he'd have an excuse to constantly be in the middle of all the action all around the world, helping out through sharing stories when he's not saving the day with a cape.

BLOGGER

This appears to be the direction in which Kent will be going <b>Superman</b> writer Scott Lobdell told <a href=http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/2012/10/22/clark-kent-superman-comic-book-series/1648921/>USA Today</a> that "he is more likely to start the next Huffington Post or the next Drudge Report than he is to go find someone else to get assignments or draw a paycheck from," suggesting that we're doing to see Clark Kent follow in the footsteps of <em>Amazing Spider-Man</em>'s Betty Brant, who went from being a reporter at the Daily Bugle to running her own news site when the DB collapsed (literally) during the thrice-monthly period of the title. <p>Whether or not this means that we'll see <a href=http://doonesbury.slate.com/strip/archive/2012/10/6>Kent have to struggle with the demands of today's Internet</a> in addition to fighting super crime remains to be seen, of course.

FULL-TIME CRIMEFIGHTER

Of course, why does Superman even <em>need</em> another job? Isn't he busy enough with his never-ending battle <em>as Superman</em>? <p>Going out looking for another career on top of that just seems a little selfish especially considering that, as an alien who gains his power from the sun's rays, he doesn't exactly have to actually <em>eat</em>, and therefore doesn't need money for groceries like regular people in the DCU. <p>Isn't Clark Kent taking on a second job just taking a job away from an everyday American who <em>does</em> have to eat? Sure, giving up income may mean that he'll lose his apartment, but as Cyborg has demonstrated in <em>Justice League</em>, there's apparently room to hang out in the premier super team's headquarters. We've already seen Superman attempt to give up the Clark Kent persona in <em>Action Comics</em> during Grant Morrison's run but maybe now is the time where he decides to kill off his alter ego for good... and, perhaps, the good of the world.

Truth, Justice, Unemployment: What CLARK KENT Could Do Next

Date: 26 October 2012 Time: 08:28 PM ET